Santa Claus – Phil Morimitsu

 

   I turned off the radio in a slight rush, before anymore of the canned Christmas music could float uninvited into my study. I'd always liked the feeling that came when it was Christmastime, but now that I was getting older, the overkill of the media made it tiresome — especially when they played so many Christmas carols over the radio in endless repetition.

 

   I'm not really sure how old I was at the time. Maybe it didn't happen in just one year, but over a number of years. I was probably about six or seven years old when I snuck into the living room and saw my dad arranging my toys under the Christmas tree, playing with some of them. I was mostly interested in seeing what I was going to get, but at the same time, I was shocked by the reality of how my toys got under the tree. Yet I was not really surprised that all these years my dad was Santa Claus. I went back to bed, satisfied that I was in fact going to get lots of presents. At the same time, I felt I'd taken one more step into the world of grown-ups by seeing that there was in fact no Santa Claus.

 

   The kid across the street was a year-and-a-half older than I, and he had an older brother to learn all his worldly knowledge from. All that past year, he'd been chiding me that I still believed there was a slight possibility there was indeed a Santa Claus. Now, I felt I'd somehow joined the ranks of him and his brother, now that I'd seen with my own eyes and had proof.

 

   But as the years passed and I got over the disappointment of there being no Santa Claus, the next phase of Santa-Claus reality came over me — probably when I began to get more from giving presents than from receiving them. This new phase was believing that Santa Claus did in fact exist in each of our hearts and that Santa Claus is just another name for love. Later I sardonically equated this analogy with the syrupy, emotional realizations that adolescents have. Nevertheless I recognized and appreciated it.

 

   The Vairagi ECK Masters never fell into the category of Santa Claus. I was able to see them, and in particular, to physically meet Sri Harold Klemp, the Mahanta, the Living ECK Master. In many ways, though, first seeing him in the physical was like it would have been to seen Santa Claus, instead of my dad, bringing my toys on Christmas Eve.

   But the Nine Silent Ones were another story. When it came to them, I was somewhere between six and seven years old. I believed, but part of my mind was telling me very sardonically and skeptically that they were in the same league as Santa Claus. If they were real, why hadn't I met them yet?

 

   This story isn't to tell you about an encounter with one of the Nine Silent Ones in my study; that one sat down for tea to tell me what the state of the world was or anything like that. All I can do is report the facts as they happened.

 

   Actually, in starting this story, there is so little to tell that it's not even really a story. It's hardly enough to bother mentioning. But for me, it was proof enough.

 

   I was reading in my study. It is my habit, when my eyes get a little tired, to lie down and take a bit of a catnap; a habit I think i picked up from my father. My father used to work long hours, and since he was self-employed, sometimes he'd make it home for lunch. Then for about fifteen or twenty minutes, no more, sometimes less, he'd lie facedown on his bed and fall asleep. Then refreshed, he'd take off like a rocket for another five to seven hours of gruelling running around and hard work.

 

   I'm not sure I'm as hard a worker as my father was, but I picked up on the nap part, as well as the ability to fall asleep quickly.

 

   So just before one of these fifteen-minute catnaps, I went to my bed and flopped facedown on it, expecting to fall asleep within the minute. Instead, the exact opposite happened. As I lay with my face in the pillow, I sensed a huge opening in the area where the pillow and head of the bed was. If this sounds like this is some kind of out-of-the-body experience, perhaps it was; but I could definitely tell a difference. This was something I was observing, and it wasn't happening to me. That is, I wasn't going anywhere; I was on the outside of the experience watching what was going on.

 

   There was a gap into infinity, and a quick, cold wind shot through the passageway. All I experienced was the tail end of it, but it was raw — raw freedom and the power of freedom. It was so strong, it was cold. But it burned me at the same time, like I was breathing dry ice. Then the gap closed just as quickly, and I was aware that I was facedown in my pillow again. I quickly sat up in bed, and my first thoughts were, what in the world was that? The whole experience took all of two seconds.

 

   Needless to say, I didn't feel sleepy anymore, so I got up and went into my study to think about this. I was stumped. Usually, when I had some kind of earth-shattering experience, I was in the middle of it. But this time I was just an observer, and it burned me — ice cold.

 

   "Silent One," Wah Z said quietly.

 

   A little startled, I turned to the couch, where he usually made his appearances in my study, and looked at him.

 

   "Huh?" I said dumbly.

 

   He repeated himself for my benefit. "It was a Silent One passing."

 

   I sank back into my chair, the realization very similar to that of seeing my dad putting toys under the tree. But there was none of the disappointment I'd experienced before. Instead, there was just shock and confusion. I'd always expected the Silent Ones to be some great looking beings in holy robes preceded by a huge tidal wave of love and emotional feelings, as well as a chorus of music and who knows what else. But this was totally different from anything I'd expected. It was such raw power. I couldn't equate it with anything I'd previously experienced. Wah Z sat in silence, so I got up out of my chair and ran my finger across my collection of ECK books, resting my index finger on a copy of ECKANKAR — The Key to Secret Worlds by Paul Twitchell. Looking in the index, I found where there might be some information on these beings. I flipped through the pages until I came to what I was looking for and read the following passages:

 

   "These strange beings are responsible for the running of the planes of God on a mechanical basis. They never fail in their work because of their ability to absorb the cosmic power at such a fantastic rate. It is this that keeps them at their varied duties. They come and go like the wind to carry out the will and wishes of the Lord of the universes. Although they rarely manifest themselves, they still have the ability to do so anywhere in the universes to carry out an order." Further on I read:

 

   "They have immense powers and great wisdom to carry out the assignments of the SUGMAD and, of course, unlimited freedom.

 

   "Outside the SUGMAD, these Silent Ones are the most powerful beings in all the worlds, and next to them are the spiritual travelers."

 

   I rested the open book on my desk and let my mind piece together what I'd just read with what happened to me. What did they have to do with me? My mind started making deductions. If they were such great beings, I must have done something or maybe I warranted their presence, I didn't consciously think it, but deep in my subconscious mind, there was the impulse that maybe I must be pretty hot stuff spiritually after all, more so than I thought. All of a sudden, I felt blessed and swelled-headed at the same time.

 

   Wah Z spoke up for the first time in a while. He'd been picking up my thoughts; a fact I'd forgotten he could do which was more than once was the cause of embarrassment on my part.

 

   "Well, you are indeed blessed by having the presence of one of the Silent Ones brush through your life, but as far as the hot-stuff-spiritually goes, well…"

 

   With a humiliating and sinking feeling I knew by the way he said that last well…that it mean I was anything but hot stuff of any kind.

 

   Wah Z continued, "In this particular case, the Silent One was passing through your area of consciousness while on a mission in the lower worlds, so I wouldn't be too flattered to think It made a special trip to see you. In fact, it was just fortunate that you were able to be in Its pathway. There were other reasons you were placed in Its path. There were some pretty rock-hard mental engrams in your mind that were so calcified, it took the shock of something pretty strong to break them up."

 

   I was looking at the floor by this time, so great was my embarrassment. So Wah Z did have something to do with the Silent One passing in my direction; rather, I was led to be placed where It would be passing. I sat looking at the floor for some time; and when I looked up, Wah Z was gone. I was relieved, because even though I knew as the Mahanta he was always present, I didn't particularly feel like seeing his light body in front of me to remind me what a fathead I had been to think that I was so great that a Silent One would choose to visit me.

 

   The next three days were interesting in that I felt there was a part of my mind that was definitely changed from the ice-cold burn of the Silent One's passing. It was almost as if I'd forgotten how to hold on to some of the thought forms that I now realized held me back from unfolding spiritually. It was a loss I was glad to have. Wah Z didn't come by in his Light body for those three days, as if he were letting me absorb the new changes and lessons I had learned. Then on the evening of the third day, I heard his happy familiar voice gently chiding me from the couch in my study.

 

   "Had some tea with any Silent Ones lately?" he chuckled.

 

   "Oh, Wah Z," I said, glad to see him again. "That was a really interesting thing that happened the other day. I'm just now putting all the pieces together."

 

   He just nodded silently in that way of his, seeing that apparently I'd learned some of what I needed to learn from my experience. Then he began again.

 

   "You know, A Silent One doesn't always appear as an ice-cold burning flash with gongs and ringing bells. Being a totally free agent of SUGMAD, It can take any form It needs in order to complete a mission. It can appear as a rock, animal, human, the wind, or just raw energy as you experienced. The form doesn't matter. The mission is the only important thing. In your particular case, It took the form of raw energy as that was the only thing that would have penetrated your thick consciousness at that moment.

 

   "Let me ask you something. If a Silent One decided for reasons of Its own, to manifest as that white pebble in your planter, how would you treat that pebble?"

 

   I reached up into the planter, picking up the pebble he was talking about. It was pretty small. "I guess with great reverence and respect," I said slowly.

 

   Wah Z smiled and said, "Maybe there is a Silent One inside that pebble." And with that, he smiled and disappeared, leaving me to look at the tiny rock sitting in my palm.

 

   At first, I had feelings of great respect and reverence for the pebble; then realizing that every material object in the room —in the world — was a possible front for a Silent One. I realized that I could go around all the time in a state of blissed-out awe and respect. If I wasn't careful, I might get run over by a car while crossing the street in awe of the asphalt.

 

   "Wait a minute," I said to myself. "There's got to be a balance in all of this. I can't be walking around like a spacecase."

 

   I tossed the pebble back into the planter and pulled on a jacket to take a walk. Once outside, the air was cool and crisp. There was a feeling of happiness and giving in the air that usually accompanied the magical time that was Christmas. With all the glitz and mercantile hype, the fact remained that at Christmas, apart from all the religious and historic traditions, there was a feeling that came over this part of the earth  of goodwill and charity that would have the upper hand in man's  otherwise mundane and brutal world.

 

   As I crossed the street and observed the evergreen wreaths with their  cheery lights hanging on the dull gray street light poles, I thought about the pebble again and wondered if it would in fact be possible to keep that feeling of awe and respect for all of life on a daily basis without becoming a nuisance to society. I thought again about the experience with the Silent One, how It had burned away some of the mental engrams I'd had. If there would ever be any proof that they existed, I was walking-and-living proof.

 

   For some reason, I thought about Santa Claus again, of when I first realized that while perhaps there wasn't a fat guy in a red suit that climbed down your chimney, that Santa Claus did indeed exist in man's heart in the form of goodwill and love. Maybe, just maybe, it would be possible to have the awareness to be able to recognize the presence of the Silent Ones in every pebble and chunk of asphalt.

 

   I turned the corner and passed a bar that was playing Christmas carols in a rowdy polka-style. For some reason, I was struck by that same sense of awe and respect as when Wah Z talked about the pebble. When i thought about Wah Z, a feeling of love came over me. It wasn't the emotional, sentimental love; it was caring and company. I didn't see him with my physical eyes, but then again, I didn't feel the need to; I knew the Mahanta existed in the heart. Walking down the street with the bars and blinking lights, my doubting frame of mind was set aside for a moment, while I enjoyed the company of the Living ECK Master and Santa Claus.

 

 

From the book, In the Company of ECK Masters © 1987 Phil Morimitsu