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The human mind,  inherently impatient, triggers emotional reactions when our ideas about how things should be collide with how things are. We sometimes torment ourselves about choices we’ve made, words we’ve spoken, and the path not taken. Or we dwell on the future, postponing our happiness with thoughts about what is missing or wrong in the present moment.

These thoughts and judgments are the source of our emotional pain.

The mind has a lifetime of conditioned beliefs and expectations through which it filters all perceptions. While the body spontaneously lets go of pain the moment the underlying cause is healed, the mind has a mysterious instinct for holding on. Through the mind, we create a prison of suffering and then forget that we are the architect and that we ourselves hold the key that will set us free.

Even after years of emotional healing work, we all sometimes make the mistake of believing that something “out there” makes us angry, depressed, anxious, or afraid. In reality, outside events are only triggers. The cause of every emotion is within. By uncovering the false perceptions that cause us to cling to pain, we can open to a deep experience of peace.

Practices  for Emotional Release

When you find yourself flooded with a negative emotion, the following practices can help you find your way back to your core of balance, peace, and wellbeing.

• Resist the impulse to ignore your feelings, push them away, or judge them as bad. Instead ask them what they are trying to tell you. All emotions – including the most difficult ones – exist for a reason: to help you. will help you tune in to the message your body wants you to hear.

• Be objective. If you identify personally with negativity and think, I am angry, depressed, miserable, stressed out, etc., it will be extremely difficult to detach and let go. Learn to see all emotions as only energy, like electricity that flows through you but isn’t about you.

• Practice self-compassion. If you feel overwhelmed, tell yourself, “Whatever fear says, nothing can destroy me. I’m having a strong reaction right now, but it isn’t the real me. This too shall pass.

• Take responsibility. If you find yourself reacting to certain situations in the same way, ask yourself what you need to learn to change your automatic response.

• Meditate.  Meditation is one of the best ways to loosen the grip of sticky emotions and connect to our true self.  In meditation we disrupt the unconscious progression of thoughts and emotions by focusing on a new object of attention. For example, in the practice of Primordial Sound Meditation, the object of attention is a mantra that we repeat silently to ourselves. A mantra is pure sound, with no meaning or emotional charge to trigger associations. It allows the mind to detach from its usual preoccupations and experience the spaciousness and calm within. In the silence of awareness, the mind lets go of old patterns of thinking and feeling and learns to heal itself.

http://www.chopra.com/articles/healing-the-source-of-emotional-pain

5 Steps to Releasing Unhealthy Emotions

Follow these simple steps to help you process your emotions and empower you to start owning your feelings and letting go of the ones that don’t serve you.

1. Talk, talk, and talk some more.
Get your feelings out. Acknowledge every one your feelings even if they seem unjustified, wrong, or unproductive. We feel what we feel. Talking about your feelings to a therapist, friend, or family member helps lessen their intensity. I talked to my closest friends and sought out people who had gone through similar struggles.

Processing my emotions with people I trusted allowed me to let my feelings out and then let the negative ones go.

2. Don’t stay the victim.

Talking about a trauma or painful experience in your life can help you process your emotions. There is a point, though, when you need to let go of your victim story and move forward.

There's no timeline on when you need to be “over” something. However, you can ask your friends to tell you when they feel you're still stuck rehashing your experience, which can give you an indication of when it's time to move on.

My parents were the ones who told me “Don’t let this experience define you. Don’t let a person take away all that you are. Pick yourself up like a fighter in the ring and move on.” Their words pushed me out of victim mode.

3) Don’t blame others for your feelings.

Feelings are yours and nobody else’s. I found myself saying, “He makes me feel like …” or “They make me feel like …” The truth was, “he” and “they” only had the power to make me feel anything if I allowed it. Own your feelings. When those  difficult feelings come up, tell yourself: "I can accept that I feel upset about this today, but tomorrow I can choose to feel differently about this situation if I want to.” You have more power over how you feel than you might realize. Owning your feelings is the key to healing them.

4) Write, meditate, or pray.

What helps you stay centered and connected amid the chaos? I write and get all of my emotions out on paper; I burn the ones I can’t share with others. I imagine all of that anger, resentment, and negativity being burned up and released so I can let it go. Journaling is an excellent tool for expressing emotions you might not be able to say out loud to people.

I also have a deep and regular meditation practice. I ask for guidance and any information that will help me make decisions for my highest self. I listen for the quiet voice that answers. One of my favorite mantras to stay grounded is “Breathe in the good sh*t, breathe out the bullsh*t.” I know, not very “spiritual” but I swear it works and helps me not take things so seriously.

5) Forgive and let go.

Forgiving isn’t about condoning another’s behavior; it's about shifting your own perspective. If you can replace anger and resentment with compassion, you can release the toxic emotions and move on with your own life.

Passage: http://www.chopra.com/articles/5-steps-to-moving-past-painful-experiences