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For many of us, a huge part of daily conversation revolves around gossip. We love to talk about the blunders and missteps of friends, family, and celebrities. On top of that, news organizations and social networks are like outrage amplifiers because that’s what gets the clicks. We are all used to name-calling in the news, especially when it’s directed at politicians or performers. But there’s one particular name that really gets our attention. If you want to destroy someone, call them a “hypocrite.” – Erman Misirlisoy PhD

Conscious? What Conscious?

“Hypocrites know the truth but fail to reveal it.” *

No one likes a hypocrite and we dislike hypocrites more than people who are straightforwardly awful but make no mistake about it, there isn’t a human alive who doesn’t engage in glorious hypocrisy on occasion. Believe it or not, hypocrites are in full cognizance of what they are doing – they are not simply two-faced people just trying to manipulate a minor temporary situation. It is a cruel addiction.

Recognizing Traits in Others but Mainly Yourself

Here is a nice checklist compiled by Frank Sonnenberg: **

• Say one thing but do another.
• Treat those in power differently than they act toward underlings.
• Give advice but fail to follow their own guidance.
• Preach tolerance but judge others who don’t conform to their way of thinking.
• Volunteer others but rarely raise their own hand.
• Live one way in public but another in private.
• Pretend to be someone they’re not merely to win acceptance.
• Make rules but fail to follow the rules themselves.
• Preach morality but live a shameful life.
• Demand things of others that they’re unwilling to do themselves.
• Say one thing to someone’s face but another thing behind their back.
• Pretend to be wealthy even though their bank account is bare.
• Alter their opinion to gain acceptance from people with differing viewpoints.
• Condemn the actions of others even though they commit those same acts themselves.
• Promote a holier-than-thou image merely to offset reckless behavior.
• Help people only when it’s in their personal interest to do so.
• Pretend to care when their motive is really self-serving.
• Demand austerity for others but handsomely compensate themselves.
• Feign outrage even though they have no intention of doing anything about it.
• Penalize some folks for wrongdoings but look the other way for others.
• Lecture people about morality but cover up for their friends.
• Judge others but call people intolerant when they’re personally judged.
• Act one way when folks are looking; the opposite when they’re not.

Being Authentic – Moral Character Counts

“Some people are like pennies. Two-faced and worthless.”

It’s not always easy to admit a mistake, persevere during tough times or follow through on every promise made. It’s not always comfortable to convey the hard truth or stand up for your beliefs. In the short term, it may not be beneficial to do right by your customers, to put people before profits, or to distance yourself from a questionable relationship. BUT, in the long run, doing the right thing is the clear path to both success and happiness.

When you have strong moral character, you’ll be judged by who you are rather than who you pretend to be; you’ll be a trusted friend rather than suspected as a foe; you’ll learn from your mistakes rather than hiding them in fear; you’ll serve as an outstanding role model for your admirers rather than leading them down a dead-end path; you’ll look forward to the future rather than defending your past; and your reputation will do you proud rather than reveal your flaws.

Although you may not be able to quantify the benefits of being a good person, there’s great truth in the saying, “good people finish first.” Strong moral character is like a boomerang that causes good things to find their way back to you –– but it takes effort. Jim Rohn, the business philosopher, said, “Character isn’t something you were born with and can’t change, like your fingerprints. It’s something you weren’t born with and must take responsibility for forming.” So promise yourself to be true to yourself and do what’s right, even when nobody is looking –– Character matters.***

*, ** https://www.franksonnenbergonline.com/blog/23-ways-to-spot-a-hypocrite/

*** https://www.franksonnenbergonline.com/blog/moral-character-matters/