Submitted by Claire de Lune on
By Ande Waggener J.D.
Self esteem can often seem elusive, as if it’s something out there that you have to go get. If you have low self esteem, it may feel like you can’t possibly raise your self esteem by yourself.
The truth is, however, that high self esteem is within you right now. It’s something you can grab onto and claim.
Don’t believe me?
I’d like you to do something for me. Say your name out loud to yourself please.
Now, tell me, how did you feel when you said your name?
Did hearing your name create a positive feeling? A sense of empowerment? Did you feel love? Confidence? Self esteem?
What images came into your mind when you said your name?
Did you think of the great things you’ve accomplished and experienced in your life? Did you think of your expectations and your joys?
Or did your name bring up a bad feeling? Did it create a sensation of pain or lack of confidence?
Did you get negative images?
Did you see your failures and unpleasant experiences? Did you see your worries and fears?
When my husband, Tim, came into my life in 2001, he began calling me Ande instead of Andrea. I wasn’t used to being called Ande (pronounced Andy), but I kind of liked it.
As time went by, I liked the nickname more and more, and I discovered that when I heard the name, Andrea, it tended to bring up negative connotations for me. “Andrea” had associated with it a bunch of my past programming that I didn’t. “ Ande” had a freshness, an acceptance, that I found empowering.
I made a decision to start calling myself Ande. And I asked everyone I knew to start calling me Ande instead of Andrea.
That was a big favor to ask, I realize. And for awhile, friends often called me AndreaAnde because they’d catch themselves using my full name and change to the nickname. But eventually everyone (everyone but my parents, that is) began calling me Ande. And of course, with anyone new, I used Ande.
The most profound healing I’ve had in the areas of self esteem and confidence have occurred since I began calling myself Ande. Calling myself Ande became a key that unlocked all the self esteem and confidence I wanted.
Now, I’m not going to tell you that simply changing your name is going to raise your self esteem. But I will suggest that any shift you make that moves you in a more positive direction will help you relieve low self esteem and low self confidence.
If you have negative associations connected to your name, think about taking a new name or coming up with a new version of your old name.
Call yourself something that brings up good feelings and you’re more likely to feel good. I know it sounds simple, but it works to raise your self esteem.
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