Submitted by Kartr on
Revenge is the desire to get even when someone does you wrong. It’s natural to feel angry, to say “I’m not going to let that **** get away with this,” whatever “this” is. However, revenge reduces you to your worst self, puts you on the same level as those spiteful people we claim to abhor. - Judith Orloff M.D.
When another person wrongs you, your typical first thought is one of revenge. We think that by inflicting similar pain onto this person, we'll make ourselves feel better. While that may make our sick-minded selves feel better for a little while, it most likely will not in the long run. Seeking revenge doesn’t cancel out the behaviors that hurt you. It just perpetuates the cycle of pain.
We have all wanted to exert some sort of revenge on something at one point or another in our lives; it is a normal reaction when we are wronged. We all want that assh*le to pay for what they have done to us. As great as all that sounds, you really do not want to take part in this type of behavior.
Instead of focusing on revenge, it is much more beneficial to try to make peace with the issue. The only way to stop revenge is to give up and accept it. Replace the evil feelings with the opposite thinking. This is the only way; rise above it and let it be.
“Revenge... is like a rolling stone, which, when a man hath forced up a hill, will return upon him with a greater violence, and break those bones whose sinews gave it motion.”
There is a famous saying, “before seeking revenge, first dig two graves.” When you seek vengeance, you hurt yourself as well, if not more. You are not going to feel good about hurting someone regardless if it is warranted or not. Your anger toward this person will only increase if you preoccupy yourself with revenge. We all get hurt or taken advantage of at some point in our life, which is just a sad fact of human beings.
Living well is the best type of revenge; showing the other person that his negative actions did not phase you will infuriate him. Why are you allowing someone else to live rent free in your head? There is no reason to waste your precious time and energy worrying about someone that does not even matter. Retribution turns you into the thing that injured you in the first place. It is not worthy of you. If you concentrate on revenge, you will keep those wounds fresh that would have otherwise healed.
“The best revenge is just moving on and getting over it. Don’t give someone the satisfaction of watching you suffer.”
We are the only people we can control, we cannot control others. By engaging in this type of behavior, you are actually planning a long-term destruction of your life, since misery is you constant companion. You need to move forward, not focus on the past. There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness; revenge of any sort is extremely toxic.
cDo not lower yourself to someone else’s level because then you become just as bad as they are. When people seek out revenge, it tends to consume them entirely. Some people take it way too far and it is hard to control yourself once you get going. Time is the best way to distance yourself from the situation.
“The ultimate revenge is living well and being happy. Hateful people can't stand happy people. Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.”- Confucius
If you really think about it, why do you even need revenge? You can get past anything someone did to offend you without it. You do not need any sort of interaction from these people. Distance yourself and never let them see you suffer.
Karma is a bigger bitch than you need to be. What goes around, most definitely will come back around. Karma works because we remove ourselves from the cycle of bad behavior. Patience is a virtue in this situation, sit back and let Karma go to work. The best part is that when it eventually comes back to haunt the other person, you had no part in it and you will have a clean conscious.
https://www.elitedaily.com/life/why-we-need-to-stop-seeking-revenge
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